(Image Copyright Marvel Studios; Disney Studios)
*SPOILERS*
I haven't made a secret of my dislike for the last five minutes of Avengers: Endgame; I wrote a whole blogpost about how Steve Rogers is dangerously Obsessive-Compulsive based predominantly on those five minutes. It just felt so cheap and disingenuous that it leaves (even years later) a sour taste in my mouth every time I think about it.
The worst part of the whole thing - at least for me - is that those five minutes could have been off the charts amazing if not for the last 15-second shot of Steve dancing with Peggy in 19XX.
Also, for her to be that young, wouldn't he have to go back to the 40s even though they jacked the space stone from the 70s? Does that mean he jumped an extra time for the single-minded purpose of cutting into Peggy's past? Is Steve Rogers a time-traveling homewrecker and child murderer?
But I digress.
Think of, instead, what would have happened if the camera panned into a nondescript suburban house in the 40s to zero in on not Steve and Peggy, but Steve and Natasha.
That's right, Natasha Romanov. The same Natasha Romanov who sacrificed herself for the soul stone so her Found-Family could live.
And no, I don't mean Steve dancing with her corpse. Blech.
Now, I'm not going to deny I'm a Romanogers shipper; I have been since the first Avengers movie (and seriously, Bruce and Natasha? Just...why?). But shipping Romanogers has nothing to do with wanting Natasha at the end of Endgame (okay, not nothing, nothing). After all, it doesn't take a genius to realize Steve and Natasha love each other as friends above all. They spent five years watching each other's backs and had an undeniable rhythm from the very start. There's a reason the camera lingered on Steve after moving to Hulk-Bruce when Clint revealed Natasha was dead.
(And, again, why Bruce? Where did that even come from? And why are we still pretending it made sense?)
All that said, even with just the friendship they shared, I find it impossible to believe that Steve just left Natasha lying there dead in an alternate-universe Vormir upon his return of the alternate-universe soul stone.
I mean, consider. He had to put the soul stone back at the exact point in which Clint received it. That means, at the very least, he would pop onto Vormir and look down to find Natasha lying broken in a puddle of her still-warm blood, and then he...what? Handed the soul stone to Red Skull - of all people - offered Natasha's corpse a two-fingered salute of "respect," and then hop-skip-jumped his way to 194x to steal a dance from a woman he literally laid to rest?
Just...what?
Are you even kidding me?
And that brings me to Black Widow.
For a movie people have been asking for since Natasha Romanov first appeared in Ironman 2, Black Widow was, well, it was fine. It was beautifully shot and choreographed, there was less shaky-cam than normal in the fight scenes, and the banter between Natasha and her faux-family actually got me to laugh-out-loud a few times.
But what was the point?
Not even a real origin story - which, thank goodness, that would have been terrible - Black Widow doesn't really add anything to the MCU lineup.
So Natasha has a sister now, so what? Based on the end-credit scene (SPOILERS) it seems Yelena is going to become some sort of antagonist in the Hawkeye show, but is that seriously the only reason the movie was made? As an origin story for Hawkeye Hunter Yelena? Is she the Black Widow the movie is titled for? Because that would mean Natasha still hasn't gotten her movie.
You know, just FYI, Disney.
So, we've covered the stupid Endgame end-scene and the okay-but-why that is Black Widow. Here comes my point.
In Marvel Comics, there is a precedent for having characters go into Helheim and retrieve the dead.
Don't believe me? You can read a (very sparse, but the relevant bits are there) summary here.
So now you have all the pieces to the puzzle. Allow me to put it together.
I mentioned earlier what would have happened if, instead of Peggy, Steve was shown with a very much alive Natasha at the end of Endgame.
The internet would have imploded, then exploded outward into a supernova that, very possibly, would have destroyed the world.
Seriously. People would have lost their freaking minds.
Is it really her? How? Why? When?
The need for answers would have made the fans - and even not fans - absolutely ravenous for any and every bit of Marvel that came their way. Every movie, tv-show, and even unrelated comic would be absorbed and analyzed for even an iota-sized clue of how Natasha survived.
(Incidentally, this would have spared the MCU executives from being chewed out over the entirely non-existent memorialization Natasha received in Endgame.)
And then would come the announcement of Black Widow.
More blown minds. More digging for answers. More ravenous need for anything MCU.
And what would that Black Widow movie look like?
Pretty much exactly the same.
No, seriously. Just hear me out.
While the core plot and execution are the same, what if there was a random glimpse of Steve Rogers here and there? He's standing in a doorway, and even though he's obviously calling out to her, Natasha can neither see nor hear him. More glimpses. He's getting closer. He's getting louder. Maybe he's even getting involved. Maybe he takes out a bad guy here or there. But no matter what he does, Natasha doesn't really notice, though as the movie progresses she seems to become at least peripherally aware of him.
Which makes the audience wonder. Why doesn't she see him? Why can't she hear him? Is he even really there?
Well, yes and no.
In some versions of mythology, people who enter the underworld to rescue the soul of someone they love have to face trials. Some of those trials come in the form of reliving either their worst memories or the worst memories of the person they're trying to save. In the case of Black Widow, it would be the latter.
Now, obviously, this campy, action-adventure pseudo-family plot is not, in any way, one of Natasha's worst memories. It is, however, a very important turning point in Natasha's life. These days (weeks?) of finding her old-self while staying true to her new-self leads her to her true-self, and that is, honestly, beautifully handled. Those moments when Natasha has to justify what she did as being for the greater good, even though it's clear she doesn't - can't - believe it, is just amazing. That she was willing to fight for and save the girl she'd so heartlessly sacrificed all those years before because she needed out just goes to prove how far Natasha has come not just as a hero, but as an individual.
For the first time, Natasha allows herself to believe that she's not irredeemable. And that played no small part in her willingness to give her life for the other Avengers.
Of course, while the bulk of the film would be the same, there would be one major change.
That stupid cut-to-black while Natasha is posing for the camera in the midst of the ruined Red Room.
What even was that? Could the writers and director not think of anything sufficiently cool enough to showcase her escape from the fuzz? And why did she have to escape solo anyway? There was a freaking jet right behind her. I mean, sure, her staying behind as a decoy or whatever made sense when it was just the four of them together, but then a jet showed up. And not one person was like, "Oh, look, Natasha, a jet. I guess you don't have to stay behind after all."
Seriously.
So, yeah. Here's what this other Black Widow movie would have done in that moment.
As everyone is loading on the jet, Natasha's family climbs on first, and Yelena turns back to offer Natasha a hand up, but before Natasha can take it, Steve calls her name off-screen. Natasha hears him, really hears him, for the first time. Natasha turns to find him dressed in his white spacetime suit from Endgame, and she's justifiably confused. She asks him why he's there, and he says he's come to take her home.
After a minute or two, Natasha's memories of the 'future' come back, and she realizes she's dead. She comes to herself and is horrified that Steve is there. She tells him he can't be there, he needs to leave, but he refuses. Steve has come to take her back. Natasha tells him she won't let him trade his life for hers because she's not worth that; no one is.
Steve pulls Natasha into a hug and tells her she's worth everything. He thanks her for what she's done and promises it is more than enough. He's seen everything she's gone through since the moment she was taken back to the Red Room as a child because he was right there with her when she relived it, but Natasha wasn't ready to let go of her self-hatred until now. He explains that he struck a deal with the Red Skull (the details of which are a delightful mystery), which will allow Steve to trade Natasha's soul for his (meaning the Red Skull).
Finally, Natasha agrees to return with Steve, and the two leave Helheim and return to Vormir through Helheim’s Gate at the base of the cliff (because tell me that planet isn’t hell with a straight face). Once there, Steve tells Natasha that he only has two vials of Pim Particles left, and he still hasn't returned the tesseract to 197x (I don't remember the exact year, and I'm too lazy to look it up). They go to return the tesseract together and while there, Natasha steals more Pym Particles and tells Steve to go back to relive his life the way it should have been. Steve stares at Peggy's office door for a long while before shaking his head.
He tells Natasha that Peggy already has a life, and while he will always love her, he doesn't want to take away what she has. Natasha understands, but she's hesitant to return back to the present. Steve asks her why, and Natasha confesses that she really doesn't want that life anymore. She's tired and just wants the chance to rest. This leads Steve to asking if she wants to go with him to 1945, and she jokes with him about proposing. Steve says it is a proposal because he plans to spend the rest of his life making her happy. What that looks like, however, is entirely up to her.
Roll credits.
And then, bonus, the End-Credit scene doesn't have to change at all. Because as far as Yelena knows, Natasha is still dead. And, heck, maybe she even is dead, having died of old age, and Steve laid her to rest in that cemetery because that's what Natasha wanted.
Anyway, this was a very long post that ultimately amounts to author-rage mixed with wishful thinking and tossed with a dash of fanfiction, but to me, at least, it would make so much more sense.